Trannie Lib, One Comedian at a Time
One is called upon to defend transgender rights at the most unexpected times. I got the call at my recent company Christmas party.
The company I work for held a lovely Holiday Party at the Sheraton Hotel in Sunnyvale. Since this was my first year living full time as a woman, I had the opportunity to fulfill a long-held fantasy of showing up at the company Christmas party in a beautiful Jessica McClintock gown. Chalk up one more VLE (Virgin Life Experience)!
They wanted to do something a little bit different so they hired a stand-up comic for after-dinner entertainment. (Oh, we still got the executives' speeches. This followed.) The comedian was a cute guy, a delicious 6'7" tall (I had been checking him out all night, before I knew he was a comedian), a great deep booming voice, and in desperate need of a good gag writer. His set was 30 loooonng minutes. He imagined himself an impressionist, but he was not a good one. At least he was smart enough to follow the Rich Little rule: "Always tell the audience who you are going to do before you do it. Don't make them guess!"
So the comic launches into a bit featuring his fabulous impressions, where various Hollywood celebrities (Johnny Carson, Jimmy Stewart, Woody Allen, the usual bunch) advise George W. Bush on his Iraq policy. I was startled to hear the routine's wrap-up. Since none of the advice was any good, George W. decides simply to "have a sex-change operation and leave the country!" Milds yucks in the audience. I didn't notice anyone looking my way. Frankly, I'm not sure anyone was really listening to the comic at that point.
I left and went to the powder room. As I returned, the comic had finished up and he was making a cell phone call in the hallway of the hotel. I waited for him to complete his call, and then I introduced myself. I thanked him for entertaining us, and commented that one of his routines was pretty amusing. Then I said, "I know it ruins it to explain a joke, but could you tell me what was supposed to be funny about the thing with George Bush getting a sex change?" He explained that George didn't get any good advice, so he couldn't think of anything else to do, so he just got a sex change and left the country. Which of course was no explanation at all. I interrupted him.
"Excuse me," I said, "but let me tell you, I am having a sex change operation on February 10. And it is a very serious thing to me. I don't think it's funny at all!"
He was surprised, but (unfortunately) not taken aback. "Really?" he exclaimed. "I never would have suspected." (Granted, that felt nice.)
I explained to him that there were some funny jokes that can be made about the predicaments transsexuals find themselves in, but the idea that simply saying "sex change" is good for a laugh is quite offensive to me. I told him that a "sex change operation" is quite a serious thing for us and our friends and loved ones, and it was rude to make a joke of it. He said, "Well, I guess I won't use that joke any more then." I thanked him for that and told him I thought that was appropriate.
Then I asked him, "So, I guess this is the first time you've been called out on this one, is it?" He said, "Actually, this is the first time I used that joke." I think he was lying, but I let it slide.
He took it all in good spirits (again, unfortunately--I would have preferred to see some embarrassment and contrition) but at least he promised not to take cheap shots at us again. I only hope he thought some more about this as he drove home that evening.
As I was leaving, he said, "You know, you are very pretty!"
"Thank you!" I replied. "You are quite handsome yourself. And you can tell your wife I said so!"
He laughed, and said, "I will."
On the way out of the hotel, my boyfriend and I ran into another transsexual woman we know. She was just leaving her company party, and was dressed in a stunning, sexy silver and black gown. I wished the comedian had run into her as well. That would have really blown his mind, meeting two gorgeous transexual women in one evening! (Of course, there is no way he would have clocked her, but you get the idea..)
Love,
Lannie Rose
12/2002
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